Monthly Archives: January 2014

Poignant Notes from the Sad Breakup of Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones

6455459_sAccording to tabloid reports, 69-year-old Actor Michael Douglas is struggling to make amends with his ex-wife, 44-year-old Catherine Zeta-Jones, by appealing to his mother-in-law. If you’ve been going through a painful Alabama separation or divorce, you can learn important insights about your relationship by thinking critically about this celebrity split.

Here are some key points:

1. Do big age differences matter?

Douglas is just shy of 70 years old, while Zeta-Jones is only 44. That’s a 25 year age difference. When the couple first got together, the tabloids had a field day exploring the age difference. But just because there is a big gap between you and your spouse does not mean that your relationship is doomed. That said, there can be uncomfortable moments. For instance, Douglas is 4 years older than Zeta-Jones’s mother. To put that in perspective, when he was a senior in high school, Zeta-Jones’s mother was just in 8th grade.

2. Repairs can be made after a split.

Just because a couple separates or get divorced does not mean that the relationship is over.

If you have been pining to get back with your ex-spouse, the Douglas Zeta-Jones story may kindle some hope. Douglas allegedly has been wooing his ex-wife by helping Zeta-Jones recover from her bipolar episodes and by taking extra attentive care of their two children, 10-year-old Carys and 13-year-old Dylan.

To understand more about what you can do to deal with your Alabama divorce or other family law matter (such as child visitation or custody negotiation), connect with a Board Certified Alabama family lawyer today for a free consultation.

Roberto Zincone Splits from Malin Akerman for Reasons Unknown

10892151_sDrummer Roberto Zincone has officially split with Malin Akerman of “Trophy Wife” fame, for reasons unknown. This couple, who stayed together for more than a decade, has a 7-month-old son together – Sebastian. An anonymous source, speaking on behalf of the couple, told the media they’re trying to arrange the divorce amicably and “do what’s best for their son.”

Since not much is known about why the couple split, it’s challenging to discuss how this case might be relevant to your Alabama divorce. But there is one quote from Us Weekly that stands out as quite suggestive: Akerman allegedly said “we never had one single fight.”

You might think that “not having fights” would be a sign of healthy relationship. But some emerging research on family health and relationships suggest that fighting — in a controlled, respectful way — can be okay and potentially even useful. If you suppress your feelings and don’t express your needs, frustrations, desires, etc, the relationship can be diminished.

This obviously isn’t to say that fighting a lot is healthy. But in retrospect, even “calm” relationships can be surprisingly tumultuous under the surface. Of course, if you are already struggling with a divorce, child visitation issue, or other family law problem, it may be too late to salvage your current relationship. But you can certainly learn something by examining what happened in your marriage and what went wrong.

Along those lines, if you haven’t yet retained an Alabama child custody or divorce attorney, consider calling our team now for a free and confidential consultation about your legal needs.

Crucial Lesson from the Nigella Lawson, Charles Saatchi Split: What Happens When Others Take Advantage of Your Divorce?

Ssleepless womanCelebrity chef, Nigella Lawson, recently split from her second husband, Charles Saatchi. Their breakup made international headlines, in part because Saatchi apparently choked Lawson outside a fancy London restaurant. But there’s another element to this story that could be keenly relevant to your Alabama divorce or child custody battle. Two of Lawson’s housekeepers, Elisabetta and Francesca Grillo, are on currently on trial for fraud.

The nannies/assistants/housecleaners allegedly spent over $1 million of the couple’s money on high-end hotel stays, accessories, clothes, and other goods and services. One story suggested that Lawson might have known what the two women were doing, but she kept quiet, because she didn’t want them to reveal evidence that she had been using cocaine.

Regardless of how the fraud trial plays out, there’s a clear moral for you: when you’re going through a divorce, you may suddenly find yourself in a vulnerable, even defenseless position. You can be taken advantage of by strangers, unscrupulous business partners, unethical housekeepers, and even friends and family members who lack a strong moral compass.

So how can you protect yourself, your marital assets, and your children, when you’re consumed by a divorce or child custody battle in Alabama?

The answer is not simple. There are no “magic pills” that will fix your situation.

However, to the extent that you can retain and work with a trusted, Board-Certified Alabama family law attorney – who can provide aggressive assistance and answer your questions – is to the extent that you can reduce your stress and be more alert. Call us now to schedule a confidential, strategic consultation.

2 More Points to Take Away from the Michael Douglas-Catherine Zeta-Jones Breakup

20142116_sThe tabloids report that actor Michael Douglas has been trying to get back together with his ex-wife, Catherine Zeta-Jones, by cooking breakfast for their kids every morning and by attending to Zeta-Jones during her illness. If you’re going through a similarly agonizing breakup in Alabama, what can you take away from their story?

Here are two more key ideas:

•    Mental illness can lead to divorce and complicate negotiations and visitation/child custody.

•    Mental illness can change people. But the process can be slow and painful.

In the National Enquirer article about the Douglas and Zeta-Jones’ relationship, the journalist alleges that Douglas has been trying to woo Zeta-Jones’ mother, so that she might sway his ex-wife to reconsider the split. This kind of gambit is not at all uncommon in divorces, particularly in separations in which one spouse wants to get back with the other one.

Enlisting allies for the purpose of swaying pivotal stakeholders is a classic negotiating strategy. But this kind of strategy can be hard and unpredictable. Changing other people is a very complex task — it is often impossible.

So what should you do?

First, focus on changing yourself.

•    How do you want to be after your divorce?
•    What code of ethics do you want to live by?
•    What do you need to work on in your life to meet your needs and take care of your kids and business?

By starting from this point – focusing on inner work – you may find it a lot easier to negotiate more effectively regarding your divorce or child visitation.

For help with your family law matter, connect with our attorneys now to get a sensible, strategic free consultation.